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Some of you will know that my Mum has just adopted 9 month old Millie from the local RSPCA shelter.

The RSPCA gave Mum Millie's file, all about her history etc. Her previous owners had bashed her head in, knocked some teeth out and damaged her eye socket. She spent 6 weeks with the RSPCA being mended.

It makes me upset just thinking about what those people did to her. And despite all that, she is absolutely delightful. Not only is she gorgeous, but she is also bright and inquisitve and so full of life. She is certainly going to keep Mum and my Stepfather on their toes.

We have all fallen in love with Millie and I know for certain that her life from now on will be full of people loving her and treating her to a happy life.

But why do some people feel it is ok to treat animals badly?

First time visit today and it was breathtaking. It puts alot of performances of this ilk far behind. A real experiance, and better the tickets were a present.

"Only Lawyers and mental defectives are automatically exempt for jury duty."
George Bernard Shaw (...more George Bernard Shaw Quotes).

"A Lawyer will do anything to win a case, sometimes he will even tell the truth."
Patrick Murray.

"The one great principle of English law is to make business for itself."
Charles Dickens.

"A man may as well open an oyster without a knife, as a lawyer's mouth without a fee."
Barton Holyday.

"The only way you can beat the lawyers is to die with nothing."
Will Rogers.

"A group of white South Africans recently killed a black lawyer because he was black. That was wrong; they should have killed him because he was a lawyer."
Whitney Brown.

"No brilliance is required in law, just common sense and relatively clean fingernails."
John Mortimer.

"Under the English legal system you are innocent until you are shown to be Irish."
Ted Whitehead.

"An incompetent lawyer can delay a trial for months or years. A competent lawyer can delay one even longer."
Evelle Younger.

"A countryman between two lawyers is like a fish between two cats."
Benjamin Franklin.


"Make crime pay. Become a Lawyer."
Will Rogers.

"I would much prefer to be a judge than a coal miner because of the absence of falling coal."
Peter Cook.

"The only difference between a dead skunk lying in the road and a dead lawyer lying in the road is that there are skid marks around the skunk."
Patrick Murray.

"A lawyer with a briefcase can steal more than a thousand men with guns."
Mario Puzo.

"A lawyer is a learned gentleman who rescues your estate from your enemies and keeps it to himself."
Henry Bougham.

"The most beautiful words in the English langauge are 'not guilty'."
Maxim Gorky.

"To escape jury duty in England, wear a bowler hat and carry a copy of the Daily telegraph."
John Mortimer.

"There are three reasons why lawyers are replacing rats as laboratory research animals. One is that they are plentiful, another is that lab assistants don't get so attached to them and the third is that they will do things that you just can't get rats to do."
Blanche Knott.

"The Scottish verdict 'not proven' means 'guilty, but don't do it again'."
Winifred Duke.

"Death is not the end. There remains the litigation over the estate."
Ambrose Bierce (...more Ambrose Bierce Quotes).

*****The Big Gorilla

There was a man that owned a giant gorilla and, all its life, he'd never left it on its own. But eventually he had to go on a business trip and had to leave his gorilla in the care of his next-door neighbor. So he explained to his neighbor that all he had to do was feed his gorilla three bananas a day at three, six and nine o'clock.

But he was never ever, ever to touch its fur.

So the next day the man came and gave the gorilla a banana and looked at it for a while thinking, “Why can't I touch its fur?” as their didnt seem to be anything wrong with it.

Every day he came in and looked for a little while longer as he still couldnt understand until, about a week later, he'd worked himself into a frenzy and decided that he was going to touch the gorilla.

He passed it the banana and very gently brushed the back of his hand against its fur.

Suddenly the gorilla went ape and started to jump around, then it turned and began to running towards the man who, in turn, ran through the front door, over the lawn, across the street, into some one else's sports car and drove off.

In the rear-view mirror, he could see the gorilla in its own sports car, driving right behing him.

He drove for two hours until the engine began to splutter and the car just stopped. He jumped out and began to run down the street, over a brick wall, into someone's front garden and up the apple tree.

He turned around to find the gorilla right behind him beating its chest.

The man jumped down and ran back in to the street screaming, until it became dark and he thought he'd lost the gorilla.

The man ran into an alleyway then, suddenly, he saw a giant shaddow coming down the street ahead.

The gorilla!

It came to the end of the alley, stood and looked striaght into the bloodshoot eyes of the man and came towards him slowly.

This time there was no escape. As the gorilla neared him, the man began to feel faint.

The giant beast came face to face with him, raised its mighty hand and said, “Tag! You're it!”

*****The Mailman

The mail carrier had a registered letter that needed a signature for a party on his route. Receiving no response to his knock on the front door, he went around to the back door which he found open, except for the screen door. He knocked. A high pitch voice from inside said, "Come in."

Upon entering the kitchen, he was confronted by the largest German Shepard he had ever seen. The dog bared his fangs menacingly, forcing the mail man against the wall. The mail man shouted, "Lady, call off you dog before he eats me alive."

The only response he got was that same high pitch voice coming from the next room saying, "Come in."

Pressing his body against the wall, he slowly worked his way to the door way leading to the next room. Looking around, he saw the room was empty, except for a parrot in a cage. After the threat from the huge dog, he was becoming quite irate and said to the parrot.

"Darn you, don't you know any words besides 'Come in?"

Without a moments hesitation the parrot responded, "Seize him!"

*****Two Storks

Two storks are sitting in their nest: a father stork and baby stork. The baby stork is crying and crying and father stork is trying to calm him. "Don't worry, son. Your mother will come back. She's only bringing people babies and making them happy."

The next night, it's father's turn to do the job. Mother and son are sitting in the nest, the baby stork is crying, and mother is saying "Son, your father will be back as soon as possible, but now he's bringing joy to new mommies and daddies."

A few days later, the stork's parents are desperate: their son is absent from the nest all night! Shortly before dawn, he returns and the parents ask him where he's been all night.

The baby stork says, "Nowhere. Just scaring the hell out of college students!"

*****The rabbit and snake

A blind rabbit and a blind snake meet each other. Neither one remembers what kind of animal they are, so they decide to feel each other.

The rabbit says, "You feel me first." The snake says okay, and he starts feeling the rabbit.

He says, "Well, you have fur all over, and a little cotton tail, and two long ears, and big back feet..."

The rabbit says, "I know! I'm a rabbit! Yippee!" Then the rabbit feels the snake.
He says, "Okay, you're long and thin, and slimy all over, and there's a little forked tongue..."

The snake says, "Oh no, I'm a MP."

hi i wonder if anyonee would actually see any benefit from the ban of fox hunting being lifted not the foxes for sure i for one hope it stays in place.whats your opinion on this .