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I dont have a routine time to go to bed I just tend to go when im tired which can be anywhere between 10pm and 3am despite that weekdays I get up at 7am but weekends I try and get a lie in and get up sometimes about 9am and if my children are at their dads sometimes lie in till about 11am if I havnt got anything to do which I know is really lazy
A lot of people I know have a routine for example my parents go to bed between 9pm and 10pm and are always up at about 6am even at weekends and my sister goes to bed about midnight and gets up at about 10am so whats your routine or dont you have one

For the last 3 months my friend has not been her normal bubbly, happy self at all. She crys for hours and doesn't know why which just makes her confused and angry. The tiniest thing upsets her and she just doesn't enjoy things anymore. She has been prescribed anti-depressants but doesn't want to take them. Anyone got any suggestions on anything I can do to help or any other way besides medication? She also won't go and see a councillor.

*****The Talking Parrots

A lady approaches her priest and tells him

"Father, I have a problem. I have two female talking parrots, but they only know how to say one thing."

"What do they say?" the priest inquired.

"They only know how to say, 'Hi, we're prostitutes. Want to have some fun?'"

"That's terrible!" the priest exclaimed, "but I have a solution to your problem. Bring your two female parrots over to my house and I will put them with my two male talking parrots whom I taught to pray and read the bible. My parrots will teach your parrots to stop saying that terrible phrase and your female parrots will learn the joys of praise and worship."

"Thank you!" the woman responded.

The next day the woman brings her female parrots to the priest's house. His two male parrots are holding the rosary beads and praying in their cage. The lady puts her two female parrots in with the male parrots and the female parrots say "Hi we're prostitutes, want to have some fun?"

One male parrot looks over at the other male parrot and exclaims, "Put the beads away, brother. Our prayers have been answered!"

*****Big Gorilla
It's a beautiful, warm spring morning and a couple are spending the day at the zoo. She's wearing a loose-fitting, spring dress, sleeveless with straps. He's wearing jeans and a T-shirt.

As they walk through the ape exhibit, they pass in front of a very large hairy gorilla. Noticing the girl, the gorilla goes mad. He jumps up on the bars, and holding on with one hand, he grunts and pounds his chest with his free hand. He is obviously excited at the pretty lady in the wavy dress.

The husband, noticing the excitement, thinks this is funny, and suggests that his wife teases the poor creature some more. He gets her to pucker her lips, wiggle her bottom at the ape, and play along. She does, and the Gorilla gets even more excited, making noises that would wake the dead.

Then the husband suggests that she let one of her straps fall to show a little more skin. She does, and the Gorilla is about to tear the bars down.

"Now try lifting your dress up your thighs and sort of fan it at him," he says. This drives the gorilla absolutely crazy and he starts doing flips. With that, the husband grabs his wife by the hair, rips open the door to the cage, slings her in with the gorilla and slams the cage door shut.

"Now, tell HIM you have a headache."

*****Insurance Company
Farmer Joe decided his injuries from his recent accident were serious enough to take the trucking company responsible for the accident to court.

In court, the trucking company's fancy lawyer was questioning farmer Joe.

"Didn't you say, at the scene of the accident, that you were fine?"

"Well, I'll tell you what happened. I had just loaded my favorite mule Bessie into the--"

"I didn't ask for any details," the lawyer interrupted. "Just answer the question. Did you not say, at the scene of the accident, that you were fine?"

"Well I had just got Bessie into the trailer and was driving down the road--"

"Judge, I am trying to establish the fact that, at the scene of the accident, this man told the Highway Patrolman on the scene that he was just fine.

Now several weeks after the accident he is trying to sue my client. I believe he is a fraud. Please tell him to simply answer the question."

By this time the Judge was fairly interested in Farmer Joe's answer and told the lawyer so.

"Well," said the farmer, "as I was saying, I had just loaded Bessie, my favorite mule, into the trailer and was driving her down the highway when this huge semi-truck and trailer ran the stop sign and smacked my truck right in the side.

I was thrown into one ditch and Bessie was thrown into the other. I was hurting real bad and didn't want to move.

However, I could hear ol' Bessie moaning and groaning. I knew she was in terrible shape just by her groans.

Shortly after the accident a Highway Patrolman came on the scene. He could hear Bessie moaning and groaning so he went over to her. After he looked at her he took out his gun and shot her between the eyes.

Then the Patrolman came across the road with his gun in his hand and looked at me.

My 14 year old daughter went out to the cinema last night with her friends and my mobile charger packed in so decided to go and hunt hers down (not an easy task in a teenagers room) Hunted high and low and tidied up a bit as I went along and came across a box of durex, in her school bag, with the three durex still in the box. Well you can imagine how shocked I was and what I was thinking, and wondering how to approach this with my baby girl!!!!! Anyway when she got home and said hi, are you OK, I said no and told her what I had found. Straight away she informed me that they had all been given them in her sex education class in school. I dont doubt this as she was too quick to answer and would not have thought of something that quick off the top of her head (belive me she is not that clever!!) So what are the schools doing encouraging 14 year olds to use condoms without consent, after all I am only her parent. I understand that they have to teach teens etc about this and the risk of pregnancy but surely there is a more suitable way of doing this than handing out free condoms for them to try. I have a meeting with the school on Friday and will be raising my concerns about this. What are your thoughts on this matter, are you as appauled as I am?

i for one find it hard to sleep well despite feeling exhaused at times.do you manage to sleep like a baby.